Continuing the previous Post, specular stage is the period in which pubers, feeling a bit more at ease with eroticism in their own bodies, start to explore sexual energy in akin bodies. It is a time marked by the intimacy that comes from sharing erotic discoveries in similar bodies (of the same sex). This is the reason why Dias calls it homosexual stage[1]. I’ll refer to it as specular stage because of the weight that the term homosexual carriers as a reference to homosexual orientation. It is also a period of confidences, secrets, and idealization. The most important character at this stage is the great friend, who embodies eroticized masculine traits (in boys) and eroticized feminine traits (in girls), i.e, they work as role models for teenagers. If people are blocked at this stage, they don’t conclude the idealized identity of the same sex. Rather, if father’s masculine existing model (for the boys) and mother’s feminine existing model (for the girls) are blocked, the fusion with new reference identities doesn’t happen. This means that feminine idealized sexual identity, for girls, and masculine idealized sexual identity, for boys, are not structured. In other words, if fusion doesn’t happen, new eroticized models are not well incorporated. As a result, girls will lack internalized reference of how to feel and behave as women would in highly eroticized situations, and the boys will lack internalized reference of how to feel and behave as men would in highly eroticized situations. Therefore, they get emotionally stuck in the “great’s friend” stage. In other words, in highly eroticized and desired situations, women “turn into girls” and men “turn into boys”, i.e, they don’t know how to feel and behave as eroticized adults. They start to unconsciously avoid highly eroticized and desired situations with the opposite sex/energy. Bearing this in mind, the question is: do people with homosexual orientation have blocks in specular stage? And if so, how does it happen? Well, they do, and they happen in the same way. However, in cases of highly eroticized and desired situations with people one feels attracted to, blocks happen in tune with one's feminine drive (welcoming/receiving energy), in women, and in tune with one's masculine drive (active energy) in men's cases. It is worth highlighting that energies are not the same as roles. In homosexual orientation cases, phobic behaviors triggered by eroticized situations can also be signs of sexual identity blocks. In these cases, people become anxious because:
1) Boys don’t haven't internalized well what it is like to be/feel in a man’s eroticized body, in tune with their masculine energy. Such energy is inborn (innate) and it is supposed to unfold into action, penetration, and combativeness in life. Hence, the lack of masculine energy appears in sex/relationships, regardless of sexual orientation.
2) Girls don’t have well internalized what it is like to feel/be in women’s eroticized body in tune with feminine energy. Such energy is inborn, and it is correlated to receiving, which is originally correlated with receiving the mother’s milk. This experience of being nursed is supposed to unfold into feelings of acceptance, welcoming. Later, it will allow them to get in get in touch with their intuition, sensibility, i.e, to become aware of their intimate needs. Hence, the lack of feminine energy appears in sex/relationships regardless of sexual orientation.[2]
To be continued in the next Post [1] For more details see Post 5-Specular stage: intimacy with specular bodies and Post 6-specular stage: blocks at this stage, in Essay: Sexual Identity Development blocks, in: www.ceciliapsicologa.org [2] For more details see Post 9- Homosexual Phase versus Homosexual Orientation-Structural blocks versus Functional blocks, in essay: Sexual Identity Development blocks, in: www.ceciliapsicologa.org
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